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#12707833 Sep 14, 2016 at 04:53 PM
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14 September

We have returned to Stormwind, but not for long. On Friday, we embark once again for the Broken Isles, this time for a more targeted mission in Stormheim. Time is so short; I have asked Riyaa to pick only the three most vital issues for me to handle, and given her leave to attend to or defer the remainder.

Tonight will be a training session. From what I understand, each officer and staff member will give a short "refresher" to the troops; I believe I am to run a sparring session. It should go well, I think.

Whitestone Hall is coming along well. The walnut trees are planted, and they haven't withered away, so I assume they are settling in. Everything is in better condition than Hallowell told me; I may even be able to move into the house before snow falls. Living there will still be rather rough--no amenities, I will have to sleep in my library, and there are no servants' quarters yet. But the most important feature, my basement laboratory, is well underway, and I will be able to resume work on the Singing Blue Crystal once more.

A real home, my own home, not some paltry set of rooms in a crowded city where I can have either fresh air or privacy, but not both. I will be able to look to the future again, build it again, a future for myself and my family.

  • Stable for work animals--will need oxen for plow. Prefer to own rather than hire.
  • Servants' quarters.
  • Ask Caiterina about Northrend herbs.
  • Keep watch for good, safe slope for sledding.
  • Firewood. Too late to cut and season properly; probably will have to purchase.

Ly Professor Atherton continues to provide pleasant surprises. She is one of the faithful, it would seem--odd for a mage, in my experience, but refreshing. Quite the relief. She mentioned having had self-defense training using illusions, a simulation; I will have to ask her how that went, and whether it is normal for the Academy.

I will call on her sometime before Friday. Until then, I must try to focus.

I wonder when Markus and Caiterina will be wed? Perhaps it will be a private ceremony; I'd heard of no invitations. I can respect the desire to share this with only one's closest friends. Public spectacle is not for everyone.

Meantime, I have a book to finish.
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#12722628 Sep 20, 2016 at 08:11 AM · Edited 5 years ago
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((The handwriting in this entry is a bit sloppier than usual.))

20 September, morning

I cannot find my glasses. My head hurts, inside and out, and in the back of my mind, something tells me that I've somehow made a damn fool of myself.

The battle I remember, the onrush of the Forsaken, the ones that fell at my blade. Abominations, and smiting them. At the sound of Markus' horn, I hastened to the gates to fight alongside the others.

The last I remember clearly is being thrown down and beaten by the Forsaken at the gates. After that, I have only scrambled memories of vomiting, bleeding, Roy waking me up, Caiterina grinning at me. Professor Atherton was there, I think, but I do not remember what was said; only that she seemed to disapprove of something. I seem to remember waking up and seeing her nearby, studying, but I cannot be sure it was not some sort of delirium.

Writing this is painful; I can barely see the page, and holding my head at this angle sets it pounding. I must find out what happened to my glasses.
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#12726978 Sep 21, 2016 at 04:09 PM
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21 September

We slew a dragon last night, a great dragon that had been the bane of the vrykul. We smote the dragon on the mountainside to prove our worth to these warriors, and prove ourselves we did. Now they wish to be allies with us, whom they know now to be mighty. It is my honor as well to fight alongside such heroes as are in this army.

The diplomacy of the sword is a valid method. I thank the Light we didn't have to use it against the vrykul.

It was as well I didn't bring my violin; even without the risk of its destruction, I would have had no time to play. There were wounded to attend: Recruit Brooks and Miss Venmenn. They bore up bravely under the pain, both of them. I will have to teach Miss Venmenn to defend herself, if she is going to be in combat so often.

Private Istvan is a skilled medic, and we are blessed to have him. He refrained from drinking precisely so that he might discharge his duties, and for that I am deeply grateful. Our patients will recover swiftly and completely.

Recruit Brooks is having a little difficulty with authority. She argued with me about gun safety, and then ignored Roy's admonition not to leave the fort. She is a performer by trade, and so accustomed to evoking reactions from people rather than avoiding being disruptive, I would imagine. I feel confident, though, that she can grow out of this phase of adjustment and become a competent soldier, and perhaps even a ranger.

Recruit Kovalevsky is quiet, and seems holy-minded. I do not know him, and yet it seems I owe him my life. That cannot go unremedied.

((The text breaks off in favor of a few sketches of jewelry.))

I feel underapplied, and I cannot account for why. Perhaps it is some phenomenon I experienced long ago.

When I was a boy, I would go rafting down the nearby creek with my "friends". I once let myself doze, only to wake up and discover that I'd been swept some distance away and my companions had abandoned ship. I hardly realized that I had traveled so fast, because I had no perspective; one feels acceleration, not velocity, and so must look at the shore to know that he is moving at all. Looking at the raft will tell one nothing.

I suppose it is happening again. Today, I have a war to fight, a house to renovate, many work projects to pursue, and several books to write. Already I am traveling fast--I have accomplished much in a few months that some might take years to achieve--but the current of the world sweeps me along, and I feel as if I were not moving at all.

I must find some perspective, something at which to look that is not traveling alongside me. But here, out in the wilderness and in the midst of this war, where may I look?
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#12744880 Sep 28, 2016 at 02:23 PM
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28 September

Races of the Burning Legion is finished. I am very proud of this work, although it is still not quite done; it needs illustrations. But it is, in the main, done. Now I may move on to other works to benefit the Regiment.

Last night, we sallied forth to aid the Valarjar against invaders, who once were their brethren but now serve the Legion. We were victorious, and won much honor from the vrykul. The Lord-Marshal is a valiant knight--as all of his soldiers are valiant--and I am glad to be in such worthy company.

Tomorrow, two of my newest and nearest friends will be wed. I have been working diligently on their wedding gift, because they deserve the best effort I can give. I will not charge them for their rings, but more than that is needed.

What is the point of having money if one never spends it? And how better to spend money than on worthy causes, on works of honor, and on the joy and comfort of friends and family?

The money I hoarded for the rebuilding of Northlight sat untouched for too long. Northlight will never be reborn, I think; I am one of very few who cares at all for the fate of Lordaeron. And even then, my home lies between two enemy nations; I can never defend my people. It breaks my heart and grates on my pride, but sometimes the only choice is surrender.

I must admit that I am more at peace with the idea of spending some of that money on Whitestone Hall, now that I am courting Lysbelle. Should things go well, if this is what is meant to be, then I will need a fine, warm, welcoming home to offer her.

More reason for ambition. More reason to climb, and strive, and improve. More reason to make the world better.
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#12749387 Sep 30, 2016 at 08:30 AM · Edited over 4 years ago
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30 September, morning

Love makes this world go 'round. There is no force so powerful, for even righteousness is born of love. Those two lives will grow together, as human lives were meant to do, and they will become something greater than they ever would have been apart.

May the Light bless them each, and bless them both, and bless all that they do and create and build.
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#12756065 Oct 03, 2016 at 09:39 AM · Edited 4 years ago
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((NOTE: Adjusted because some things I wrote can be misconstrued. If you read it before this note went up, you might need to look at it again.))

3 October

I must keep control. I must stay in control of my temper. I cannot let it rule me.

All yesterday, soldiers and militiamen and volunteers flooded into Greywatch. We are on the brink of a great battle; the enemy no doubt knows of our movements, and will be prepared, or will strike first.

I hope that our recruits are prepared. We have done all we can to ready them for war, and they have performed admirably thus far, but this will be different.

At least most of the civilians have been transferred to Dalaran. I wish I could have seen Lysbelle beforehand, said goodbye with my own voice and heard her with my own ears. She left her locket with Caiterina, to give to me with a command that I must deliver it to her.

Never have I undertaken such a noble quest, with such eagerness.

I try to focus on my duties, but my thoughts keep turning back to her. She is so excellent. I think of the end of this campaign, as I always think of the end of our campaigns; but now, instead of envisioning glory and praise from our commanders, I see her sweet smile and soft eyes as I present myself victorious to her. I imagine our hands brushing as I give back what is hers, and when she looks demurely away, I kiss her hand. In my wildest, most daring imaginings, I kneel before her, and she calls me her knight.

It is all very romantic, and fairly drips with sap. I must avoid such excesses of sentiment until I can examine and perhaps let them grow in safety, and even then in moderation. It simply will not do to let myself get carried away with this first rush of fascination, distracted and muddleheaded.

For today, I must conduct myself with honor, and fulfill my duty to the utmost. What sort of man would I be if I allowed infatuation to change me? What sort of man would I be if I abandoned responsibility for emotional froth?

I would not be the man I ought to be, and I would not be a man worthy of her love and admiration. I would betray everything I claim to love.

For her, for all of us, for the Light and the Alliance, I must be righteous and steadfast. All of these deserve nothing less.
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#12758893 Oct 04, 2016 at 12:33 PM · Edited 5 years ago
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((The page or so between the last entry and this are full of assorted things: designs of what looks like a heart-shaped pendant, that only vary slightly; a couple of outline-formatted lists that appear to cover jewelcrafting topics; short paragraphs on law-enforcement procedure; notes to himself about the maintenance of Whitestone Hall as a household.))

4 October

Soon we go to war with the Forsaken. I cannot say I am sorry, but at the same time, I am dissatisfied. They were unwilling to war with the Forsaken over the other crimes that Sylvanas has committed time and again--against Lordaeron, against Gilneas, against Southshore, against Andorhal, against Stromgarde--but apparently it is worse to abandon a group of hardened soldiers than to murder entire cities of children.

I must commend mankind for its eternally creative approach to moral priorities.

Liam's Landing is a marvel of modern construction. So swiftly it was erected, and so well! I am impressed. From here, we shall strike against our perennial foe, and rest in security between times. It is a worthy example of the Alliance's superior architecture.

Not nearly good enough to protect civilians, of course, but very few places are in this day and age. Even Dalaran was beset by the Legion's warships. I wonder how Lysbelle is, and whether she is safe. I worry for her.

All I can do is fight on and fulfill my duties, and hope that what I do will keep her safe from yet another threat.
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#12774864 Oct 11, 2016 at 09:04 AM
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11 October

I have been reminded lately that my track record has not been unspotted. Whether they remember it or not is irrelevant; I do. I cannot go back and change the past, but I can go forward as I should, and make what happened irrelevant.

The future is all lit up with the bright rays of hope, and joy. It is a great deal to wish for, and highly unlikely, but when I let myself imagine our dismissal, I picture Lysbelle there, waiting for me to fulfill her charge to me. I would not ask it; I would not expect it. I rather expect that I will have to go to her, as would be reasonable. Nonetheless, I cannot imagine the final cry of "Long live the King!" without thinking that I will turn and see her, waiting.

I will not be disappointed if she is not, but I will ride with all speed to her.

And now I realize that I do not know where that might be. I shall ask Caiterina, if I can catch her attention long enough.

I have nothing else to do on this ship but pray, study, and dream. Even planning does not satisfy me; I want to be on solid ground and at liberty to travel as swiftly or slowly as I please.

I would dearly love to let go, to feel all of the feelings that swell my heart and clutter my thoughts. But is it not too soon? We have known one another for a month, and nothing is certain; it is all so fragile. If I love too well too quickly, I will smother her, and she is so ((here, a series of words are obscured)) there is no word adequate to describe her. Suffice to say that to find another such woman would be difficult.

We have been without mail for the last while, and so I have been unable to write to her. As pressing is my inability to hear from Jacob Hallowell. I suppose I need only wait a day or so to know the fullness of how Whitestone goes--whether they plowed the buckwheat back into the soil, whether the inspections have been carried out properly on the addition, how the walnut trees and blueberry bushes are faring, all that sort of thing. I will likely swim in paperwork for days, but I am told Knight-Captain Gwyin is a reasonable sort of man; if things are done decently and in order, there should be no additional difficulties.

Much to do, so little time.
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#12781192 Oct 13, 2016 at 11:42 PM
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13 October

I am in love. Oh, Light, I am in love with her. And she is in love with me.

I am overjoyed and terrified at once.
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#12784092 Oct 15, 2016 at 11:41 AM · Edited 5 years ago
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14 October

I will likely be too tired to write this tomorrow. This evening I must leave to arrive at Westbrook timely for Pvt. Talbot's seminar tomorrow. Then I must begin to return immediately.

I chafe at the time I am losing--not from my work, but other, more pleasant endeavors. I must be away from Stormwind, and yet all my heart and thoughts are there. But if I hurry through my labors, then not only will I fail in my duty to the Duke (as master of this land), but fail to offer my lady the best home I can. Time is short: only two weeks left before it is too cold to work.

In two weeks, then, I may spend more time dreaming. For now, I must prepare a place for those dreams to come true--not unlike that field. All the most elegant plans for crops and rotations and harvests mean nothing if one never puts the plow to the soil in the first place.

Tomorrow belongs to those who are ready for it.
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#12790011 Oct 17, 2016 at 09:09 PM
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17 October

Westridge is beautiful in the autumn. The trees have put on their holiday best, as if to celebrate one last time before they must sleep for the winter. I look forward to years of this spectacle, but I wish I could share it with Lysbelle this year.

It is a long ride if one hasn't a tireless horse, such as Stalwart. As it stood, I managed the ride yesterday.

It grows colder, ever colder. As I walked to the field this morning, the grass crunched with frost under my boots. The air chilled me to the bone, weary as I was with short sleep. But the wheat is sown, and I will have my first crop of it early next year.

The rose garden is marked out and prepared, and the bushes selected for planting.

It grows late, and I am tired. I shall retire early.
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#12802423 Oct 23, 2016 at 10:11 AM
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23 October

I have been extraordinarily busy, but with much success. The basement laboratory is nearly finished, so that I shall be able to conduct research this winter. The roof is tight, but the house still requires windows to be quite snug. There is no local glazier, so I have hired one in Bridgeport. He should arrive today.

However, I depart now for Stormwind. It will be a day's journey again, but then I shall be near to her. It will be difficult not to rush to her home immediately, but I will arrive very late, and it would not be appropriate. I wonder if my letters have reached her? Perhaps I should bring the copies.

I must also reserve time for Roy, to see how he progresses, answer his questions, and give him more questions. He is a good man, but to be a knight is to be more than just a good man; a knight must lead, both on the field of battle and as an example to others.

Tomorrow, I will conduct a training session for the entire Regiment, and thenceforth, I am at their disposal. On Friday morning, I depart again for Fairpeak.

I seem to remember a thing called "sleep", once upon a time.
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#12817582 Oct 30, 2016 at 09:36 AM
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30 October

Whitestone is frozen, and slumbers under a blanket of snow. There was no point returning on Friday, for there is no more work to be done. My home, for better or worse, is as finished as it is going to be until spring.

I should return sometime soon, to examine my laboratory. I would like to complete research on the SBC, clear that from my list of tasks. It has waited far too long, but the wait was unavoidable; it was too dangerous to research under other conditions.

There is a knock at the door; my day begins. At least I got to finish breakfast.
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#12837548 Nov 07, 2016 at 02:09 PM · Edited 5 years ago
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7 November

((The handwriting is a bit awkward in places, but overall recognizably Jeremaias'.))

Sometimes, if you just have faith and patience enough, the things you want will come to you for the right reasons.

Veraxius was our target three nights ago. I have had fairly personal reasons to destroy him since Khaatri's death, but personal reasons can never be enough. No, indeed, it happens that the stars aligned, and the eredar in our sights was this one. Had it been another eredar, this mission would still have been a rousing success.

I can be satisfied that it came about as it did. The debt is discharged and the monster is dead, dead forever, never to do to anyone else what he did to Khaatri, and almost did to me. My injuries are worth enduring for this.

I do rather like the circumstances: a man'ari of countless centuries of age and full of pride for his great power--felled by a group of "mere mortals", and finally through the faith of a young priest. The Light is great.

Tolath has re-enlisted. It will be excellent to work together again--when I am able to work at all, that is. My left leg is still not responsive, and my left hand is weak, though I am recovering briskly. Intellectually, I understand that this is natural and not shameful, but at the same time, I itch to be on my feet again. I am restless; I must be doing.

Yes, I can redeem the time through prayer and contemplation and my studies, but my body is accustomed to more work. I hope I will not lose my edge as I wait; others depend upon me to be strong, as I depend upon them.

Light, grant me that I do not become a burden to my friends.
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#12843986 Nov 10, 2016 at 01:05 AM
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10 November, early morning

I think my injuries are improving. I've regained most of the grip strength of my left hand, and I'm starting to have a bit of sensation in my leg. Time will tell.

Too many jokes about amputation, though. It was amusing at first, but I'm not sure how many more I can shrug off before my grip on my fear begins to slip.

Lysbelle came to see me; she forwent eating for the purpose. I cannot imagine what I have done to merit such devotion, but there it is. I only hope I can prove worthy in future.

I am far too tired to write coherently, but these thoughts needed discharging. Now I may be able to sleep.
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#12845290 Nov 10, 2016 at 12:53 PM
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10 November, afternoon

I shouldn't be such a coward. It's not been a week yet; others have taken longer to recover from less. I suppose it's that old adage at work: "Minor injuries are injuries that happen to others." It's momentous and catastrophic when it happens to me. I should not worry so.

Pvt. Agrallian is almost certainly to be ordained a paladin. His compassion and mercy to the sworn enemies of the Alliance was commendable, a great thing to behold in these dark days. Along with his courage, he is better than most know, I think. I am proud to serve alongside him.

I have finished my recommended revisions for the one chapter of the Field Manual, and completed work on the plates for Races of the Burning Legion. I rather like them, despite the subject matter; they are better images than I had expected.

There is more revision for me to do, and I should finish the book on jungle trolls I have been intending for months. I have a text on gemology to write, as well.

After I write to Lysbelle again. She deserves my first and my best.
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#12864426 Nov 18, 2016 at 09:10 AM
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18 November

I have taken up sword and armor again--a rather poor sword, but it is a sword. It makes it hard to gauge just how much I have lost in the last two weeks; my previous, good sword was shattered in the assault on the forge camp.

I assigned myself to run laps; but in so doing, I believe I may have strained my right knee. No matter; I will press on, and trust the Light to grant me the strength I need. There is a war on, and every able body is needed.

I do not wish to be a burden any longer. I do not wish to be an object of compassion or pity. I do not wish to receive special honors that I have not earned by right of accomplishment. And when I have those honors, I prefer that they come with responsibilities, so that I will not grow proud or demanding.

I was a burden when I was twelve, and Father left me because of it. Though I know he was wrong to do it, I cannot escape that nagging certainty that if I had only gotten that job sooner, if I had mourned less openly when he needed to mourn, if had I needed less and done more

((There follow quite a few lines of text that are thoroughly blotted out, so as to make the words unrecoverable. The unredacted text resumes:))

Rationally, I know that he would have left me no matter what I did, for the fault was in him and not in me, but once a thought enters the mind, it becomes part of that mind. It takes hold, and entwines with other thoughts and feelings.

And deep in the most fundamental parts of my mind--in my heart--I am not sure I can ever conquer that fear.

But I will not be a burden. I will not need. A person who gives more than he receives is much easier to love respect tolerate

People calculate, and if a person seems to be a net loss rather than an asset, they will be much more willing to cut out that person from their lives. Fact does not bend to our preferences.
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#12867163 Nov 19, 2016 at 03:18 PM · Edited over 4 years ago
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19 November

Last night, Pvt. Istvan conducted a demonstration of first-aid techniques and information. It was most informative, most useful. I probably should have stepped in at some point to caution Recruit Cilva to save his argument for after, but I did not want to deprive Pvt. Istvan of an opportunity to show his potential to lead. He took that opportunity.

Other matters arise, and I struggle against myself. I will not record them here, not now that I have willed this journal to someone should I die.

I must do better.

I must do better.

I must do better.



Accurate cut. Best used on light-colored gems with chromium impurities, violet to mauve. Minimal energy loss throughout the cut permits the channeling of ley energies to the purpose of hastening synaptic response and improving precision of movement. Rather popular among those who dance on a regular basis.
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#12875914 Nov 23, 2016 at 06:20 PM
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23 November

So many recruits and Auxiliary personnel have come to me, asking how they might get additional training with the weapons they were issued. It concerns me--not that they may require that training (which they do not; I am confident in our trainers' professionalism), but that they are left feeling uncomfortable with those weapons. We may be in need of some new approach.

The best way to make a change is to be the change. I will compile a primer on the weapons our new personnel are typically issued--one- and two-handed swords, one-handed maces and axes, and quarterstaff--and basic techniques for their use. Anything more than that belongs to the divisions that use them. Then, anyone may give basic instruction in weapons, or learn more if they like.

I know of a few people whom I might ask to assist me, and if they are willing, I will be proud to work with them.

I have put in an inquiry with the Mage Circle, regarding the techniques they use to train their spellswords. I think that style will serve Pvt. Istvan.

  • Recruit Cilva--Quarterstaff
  • Recruit Brightwood--Mace
  • Pvt. Istvan--Sword and spell
  • Ms. Venmenn--Sword (Pvt. Talbot) and crossbow (Cpl. Stonewall)
  • Lysbelle-- ? (Does she even require additional training?)
  • Cpl. Sebale--Mounted forms

Must write to Lysbelle again. My letters might have been lost in the mail; those postal workers get overrun as the end of the year approaches. I hope she does not believe I have been neglecting her.
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#12898951 Dec 05, 2016 at 09:13 AM
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5 December

Sergeant Auromere now. I'm getting closer to earning again the rank I once held, but while I must keep one eye on that destination, I must keep the other eye on the road to it. I have much I can yet do for the regiment, for Stormwind, for my friends.

Today we deploy to Duskwood, where we will provide aid to the locals for a few days. It will be good to be back in the field.
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